The Redwing Report, April 17, 2013
By Gerry Porter
An article in The Ottawa Citizen reports that Graham Fraser, Canada’s very own Official Language Commissioner, has declared that, by ordering English-only business cards, the Honourable John Baird, Minister of Foreign Affairs, violated federal legislation requiring such cards be bi-lingual.
Quebecers are quite upset. Bless their little hearts.
John Baird should be ashamed! English-only Business Cards!? I can’t believe it. And, come to think of it, why on Earth is he referring to himself as ‘John’ when, in Canada, his real name is now Jean?Stephen Harper will, undoubtedly, have words with M. Baird regarding his insensitivity to the sensitivities of our Francophone landlord. It is unconscionable that he remain unaware of how acutely attuned these fine folks across the river in that other place are to the manner in which we tenants conduct our affairs.
We Anglos must always remember - je me souviens - Jean Sauve’s observation that “English Canadians have nothing to offer us but their stupid mediocrity. Everything that weakens and humiliates Canada must cause us to rejoice”. She thus tartly reminds us that Quebec runs Canada, not us dumbo Anglophones. If we don’t mind our Ps & Qs, Graham Fraser will roundly chastise us – again! We assure our Francophone amies that we feel their pain. We really, really do. We not only apologize for M. Jean Baird’s faux pas, we grovel.
When the Official Languages Act was enacted, it became our duty to follow Quebec’s lead in all matters linguistic and fiscal. Ours is not to reason why, ours is but to just comply.
No matter what our dear Franco friends demand - that we establish unilingual French-only facilities nation-wide, that Italian restaurants replace ‘pasta’ with pastiche, or a total, absolute, complete, utterly airtight ban on English-only business cards, we will do it. Francos say, Anglos obey. 
Remember, we neither complain, nor have dark thoughts, about our diminished circumstances; we just shut up and keep a stiff upper lip. It is we Anglos who are burdened with stupid mediocrity, not Quebecers.
If, one day, the English language is declared illegal from coast to coast, and Canada has become as corrupt and ineptly governed as Quebec, so be it. As stupid mediocrities, we won’t notice.
Mind you, Quebecers could easily bankrupt our country.
Hmmm. Well, at least they will have an occasion to strut their stuff - on the way down.
Read the story here:http://www.ottawacitizen.com/news/national/John+Baird+English+only+business+cards+violated+language/8218500/story.html
